Autocorrect on my text messages is making me look even more unhinged than normal lately, so if you ever feel bad about your texting issues, please enjoy these two examples from just the last week:
What I thought I wrote:
“I need to start being more kind to myself. I’ve been really getting down on myself lately.”
What I actually sent:
“I need to start being more kind to myself. I’ve been really going down on myself lately.”
What I thought I wrote:
“I slept for maybe two hours last night so instead of getting up this morning I just brought my laptop, a bowl of old easter candy and my notes back into bed and breakfasted with the dog and cat, who seemed confused but nonjudgmental.”
What I actually sent:
“I slept for maybe two hours last night so instead of getting up this morning I just brought my laptop, a bowl of old easter candy and my notes back into bed and breastfed with the dog and cat, who seemed confused but nonjudgmental.”
Anyway, this is my public apology to everyone I text because you really don’t deserve this and I hope you enjoy whatever is wrong with me because holy fuck, it’s a lot.
(Above: a live representation of how I assume everyone looks when they open my texts. I’m so sorry.)
